this is my dull life. this is my dull life on drugs. this is a haiku.

Tuesday, June 28, 2005

The definition of "irrespesponsible"...
What? "Irresponsible" is already taken...

So I worked from 11am to 5:30pm yesterday, then went over to Hatcher field and played a frisbee game. Supposedly, I was going to go right back to work so that I could finish up my work-shit. But then again, supposedly something called CheezeWhiz should have a respectable real-cheese-content. On this basis, I allowed myself to be convinced to go out for a drink at Big Ben's. Mistake the first.

At Big Ben's, I decided to just go for it and go in on a jug with 2 other guys on the team. Mistake the second. You see, beer-jug rules clearly stipulate:

All those who share in a jug of delicious beery beverage (who will henceforth be known as the jug-ees) must respect the beer jug rules of conduct, which state that:
a) One person shall purchase each jug, and
b) No jug-ee may depart before all participants have purchase a jug of the aforementioned beery beverage.

Doing the math, that means that if I stay for one jug, I've got to stay for 2 more, so that everyone takes their turn in buying one and the universe evens out. Come on -- who wants the universe to be all out of whack? Not me.

So I stayed for the first jug, then the second, but then everyone was leaving for George Street (yes, on a Monday) to go eat at Dexas. I was the only one who hadn't paid for any beer yet so I couldn't just go back to work, even though that's what the good ol' noggin was telling me to do. Naturally, I ignored my nogginal impulses and continued on downtown. Long-story-short, I ended up back in the lab around 10:30 or 11:00pm, with a fairly substantial buzz on. I was tired and cranky, but due to the way my experiment was going, I couldn't leave it any longer. Going home was out of the question. Flash forward through some boring and uninteresting hours, and it's 3:30am, and I'm on my way home.

Actually, while I'm on the topic: Since I was blasting an 80s light-rock station to keep myself awake while working, I would like to mention something about that "Here In My Car" song -- You know, the one with all the synthesizers. At 2 in the morning in a large empty building, it's a very creepy song. Like mucho creepy. Maybe that's just the part of me that's been exposed to all those horror movies soundtracks. You know -- those ones that enjoy playing strangely upbeat music when the audience knows something bad is about to happen, yet while the character is oblivious.

So back to being done work. I'd managed to work until I was sober, so that was a positive. I got home, made some food and watched some TV, then went to bed around 5AM. The birds were out, the sun was coming up, and I had Shake & Bake chicken in my tummy. Life was good...

...except for the fact that I had to be at work for 9.

Needless to say, I didn't make it. Now, my boss wants to see me at 9:30 tomorrow morning. He always comes in when I'm not around (yet), so he probably thinks that I just don't show. I guess it's up to me to set things straight with him. I'll just be like, "Listen Dr. H, I make my own hours. You do your thing, and I'll get you your results. I just keep odd hours. What I'm trying to say is... you don't tread on my toes and I won't kill your family. Capeesh?"

Yeah... that'd go over well.