Short bar story
I was at Christian’s a few weeks ago going up to the bar to grab another beer when this couple sitting at the bar started talking to me. I got the impression that they had just met and were making with the whole “idle breaking-the-ice conversation” thing. I can only assume that they were talking about super-heros. There was a lull in the conversation, and in a panic (I'm guessing) the dude pulled me into the conversation.
“So if he were a superhero, what super-hero would he be?” he said, addressing the girl.
“I don’t know… he kind of reminds me of Otto, from the Simpsons!”
Wasn’t sure how to take this, but feeling it uneccessary to point out that Otto wasn't a super-hero, I just laughed and introduced myself. They did the same and we started talking for a bit while I waited for the bartender.
After a sec, the guy asked, “So how old are you anyway?”
I told him I was 20. They both moaned about how old they felt, because apparently they were 28 or something.
“So hold on… do you remember when the Soviet Union split up?”
Feeling like being a jerk and making them feel even older I said, “Well, not really, but I do remember that I used to have an old coloring book with all the countries in it. I was coloring all of them different colors. My mom pointed to the Soviet Union and told me that it wasn’t a country anymore. So I decided not to color it.”
They laughed, we said our goodbyes, and I left with my beer, knowing that I’d succeeded in making them feel just a little bit closer to the grave. Hoorah!